"So our body IS attached to our head!" Insights from a global pandemic
Hi world, it’s me, Amanda. I’m writing this to you from the comfort of my humble abode, just a mere week into social isolation during the midst of the COVID-19 virus. This is not a test. As a therapist, I consistently invite my clients to check in on their bodies - “What does it feel like, right now, as you sit with me, sharing what you just have?” So, as I write this dear reader, I am scared. As much as I consider myself a grounded, rational, balanced human being, I am downright terrified of the unknown that currently surrounds us. I feel it in my chest, an almost underwater quality, where my capacity to take in full breath is limited. My jaw, a place my tension likes to live in, aches with stiffness. My stomach remains clenched - almost bracing for the onslaught of new recommendations from top health experts and government leaders. Counsellors are often discouraged from sharing their own crap, but I want to let you know that even the most qualified and trained individuals are struggling with all that comes with a global pandemic. I repeat, this is not a test.
Sitting back and watching the last few weeks unfold, I have *noticed* (extra points if you’re a client of mine who is also playing the noticing game) some key pieces that are causing the most disturbance.
The Unknown: A new “normal”? Will I be able to pay the bills as a self-employed person? When will the kids go back to school or daycare? When will I be able to visit my immune-compromised loved one? When will I be able to find full fat coconut milk at the grocery store again? That last one is kind of a joke, but even the gaps of small comforts can be hard.
Social (or as my therapist likes to call “compassionate”) Distancing: Many folks are now working from home. Places that were once social hubs, including cafes and restaurants, schools, gyms and other exercise studios have closed their doors - many sacrificing their businesses in support of our global community. This leads me to my next point…
Mental Health - So our body IS attached to our head!: In a time that the world hones in on maintaining physical health of the masses, our collective state of mental health is at risk. Anxiety runs high as we search externally for answers, refreshing the Google news tab, hyper-focusing on media, all the while likely isolated from our friends, extended family, and general routine of daily life. How times were simpler early last month.
So while the world continues to grab for our attention, promising a false sense of control if we just watch one more news clip and buy ten extra rolls of toilet paper, I stand in protest by looking inward for the answers.
“And the less I seek my source for some definitive, the closer I am to fine.”
The human body is simply remarkable. It tells us when we need rest, when we require more fuel, and sends record fast signals to our brain in order to keep us safe. Enter the amygdala. As one of the oldest parts of our brain, evolutionarily speaking, it helps the body process fear. When we are exposed to something known as dangerous, the amygdala that informs the rest of the brain to initiate the fear response - also known as fight, flight, or freeze. Stress hormones get released from your adrenal glands helping your body to respond accordingly. “Welcome to the self-isolation party cortisol and adrenaline! I see you and your stress hormone ways!” From there, our capacity to breathe increases, as does our heart rate, and our bodies fire up to manage the situation, and return to safety. This way of functioning is what the amygdala (in concert with other brain parts) does best, responding quickly in times of trouble. It is truly how we have survived as a species all these years. BUT when we are inundated with fear inducing stimuli, be it constant media “emergencies”, red banner weather “warnings” of historically relative snowfall, or late night text messages from your mother warning you about the dangers of foodborne illnesses, the amygdala can sort of get out of whack, or “inflamed”. An inflamed amygdala is not a happy amygdala. It causes hyper-vigilance, or an overly increased awareness to danger, constantly scanning the world for threat. Why is this bad, might you ask? See below for the anxiety infinity loop of your dreams.
When our brain is increasingly on the lookout for danger, we are always “on”. Imagine you are in a car with the keys turned in the ignition, in park, but pressing as hard as you can on the gas pedal. You are effectively going nowhere fast, spending so much brain and body power on the potential for threat, but without feeling any better. In this state, the body cannot rest properly, it cannot heal as effectively, and you are increasingly more vulnerable to physical disease (like the one we are currently trying to “flatten” the curve on). What’s more, you are more prone to thinking negatively (Hello!! You’re on the lookout for danger, remember?! Is that a tarantula in that dark corner, or an old sock?), a space where hopelessness flourishes and more fear blossoms, wreaking more and more havoc on your system. What’s worse, your amygdala does such a great job at processing potential threats, that we often will not register what or why we are afraid. Basically, all this can happen in the background of your consciousness, burning through your energy as you scroll further and further through the depths of Instagram. Isn’t science fun?!
“The resistance to the unpleasant situation is the root of suffering.”
Would you believe me if I told you that you have the power to snake charm your amygdala closer to a state of peace? To melt some of the concern held in lines on your forehead? To maybe even *gulp* enjoy this time of uncertainty and social isolation? Don’t get me wrong, I am not encouraging you to ignore, reject, or detest the outside world. We need what’s out there, and if we want all the good parts (friends, family, full fat coconut milk...), we have to accept the discomfort that’s out there too. In a recent yoga class with one of my favourite yoga teachers, Shawna Turner, she encouraged the class to remain open to our surroundings while remaining solid within ourselves. This is hard when your yoga studio overlooks a busy Toronto street fraught with construction and traffic. But a practice it is nonetheless. So how do we do this? Because the amygdala is one of the oldest parts of our brain, we cannot convince it to act differently through reasoning. Reasoning is for the fancier, newer brain parts (shout out to the cerebral cortex!). To calm the great amygdala, it starts with a pause. Then we look within.
“Auṃ maṇi padme hūṃ - The jewel is within the lotus.”
In her new book, Radical Compassion (2020), American psychologist and Buddhism teacher Tara Brach uses the simple acronym RAIN.
Recognize what is happening. Stop doing what you are doing - just for a few moments. Ask yourself, what am I feeling? Perhaps you first notice a physical sensation - balmy hands, shortness of breath, jaw tension, throat constriction. Perhaps you recognize an emotion first. Great! Literature spanning over the past few decades well recognizes the effectiveness of what’s called “emotional labeling” on our mood (Kabat-Zinn, 1990; O'Donohue & Fisher, 2009; Linehan, 2014; Vine, Bernstein, & Nolen-Hoeksema, 2019). When we notice and label what we are feeling, our brain can begin to repair. You’re already well on your way to a calmer amygdala!
Allow what you notice to just be. I know, I know. Do nothing? That sounds counter-intuitive, doesn’t it? How can you change something by doing...nothing? That’s just it, folks. The more we fuss and struggle, or worse, push away and blatantly disregard the signs and signals of our body, the more control it will have over us. In therapy, I call this “sleepwalking”. Giving our physical and emotional selves some space to just be and feel can have very different effects on our mental and physical health if we just give it the time it needs. With my own physical tension shared at the beginning, I might say to myself, “Well hello there jaw tension, we meet again. I see you, and recognize you’re here to tell me something.” What’s key here is to keep judgements about what you notice at bay. Judgements and frustration only make us more sensitive (read: a more “inflamed” amygdala) to what you're actually feeling. Instead of, “Oh man, not this again!!,” invite breath and curiosity in, almost as the detective of your own body, finding clues to what it’s trying to communicate to you. Speaking of detective work….
Investigate with interest and care. What do your physical symptoms represent or mean? This may take a few more moments of sitting with an uncomfortable physical sensation, really using your attention to soak up the nuances of the discomfort. Be patient here. This is a practice of quieting your “thinking” or “analytical” self, and being more open to receiving insight without forcing yourself to think of something. There is a difference! Perhaps the tightness, brow furrowing, and heaviness is related to being overwhelmed, feeling helpless, maybe even hopeless. Whatever comes up, do your best to welcome it.
Nurture with self-compassion. Sometimes I ask my clients to imagine as if their tension or stress has manifested outside of their bodies as a small child. Most likely, if a child came to you sharing their fear or sadness about something, you would not ask them to leave, become frustrated or angry. You would show interest and curiosity in the child’s experience, and offer comfort when nothing else can be done. Towards the end of this exploration, thank your body and emotions for offering you some insight - empathy is the exact opposite of judgement. Tell yourself it is reasonable to feel stressed, overwhelmed, maybe even numb. More empathy, more self-compassion, all in the simple acts of noticing, accepting, and time with your body.
“Deep within all things there is a natural rhythm, a music of opening and closing, expansion and contraction.”
These are uncertain times we live in. Confusion, fear, apprehension and stress are all normal reactions when we are confronted with the unknown. But I will leave you with this. In the natural world, there are periods of fruitfulness, richness, birth, and expansion. What naturally precedes and follows are periods of contraction, stillness, rest, and winter. Dear friends, winter is upon us and the natural world has given us a gift, if we can only see it. Rest, be still, save up, and restore. The world, our community, and our bodies require it. We need only listen.
References
Brach, T. (2020). Radical compassion: learning to love yourself and your world with the practice of Rain. London: Rider Books.
Kabat-Zinn, J. (1990). Full catastrophe living: Using the wisdom of your body and mind to face stress, pain and illness Bantam Doubleday Dell, New York, NY
Linehan, M. (2014). DBT? Skills training manual. Guilford Publications.
O'Donohue, W. T., & Fisher, J. E. (Eds.). (2009). General principles and empirically supported techniques of cognitive behavior therapy. John Wiley & Sons.
Vine, V., Bernstein, E. E., & Nolen-Hoeksema, S. (2019). Less is more? Effects of exhaustive vs. minimal emotion labelling on emotion regulation strategy planning, Cognition and Emotion, 33:4, 855-862, DOI: 10.1080/02699931.2018.1486286